End of Summer Declared! Hot Dogs Reign Supreme! Secret Guest to Charm While “Judging”

UPPER SADDLE RIVER, NEW JERSEY: Ah! It’s a bittersweet time of the year–“End of Summer!” (Boo hoo!) But there’s still time to “grab the gusto” in this weekend’s “Upper Saddle River Yearly Labor Day Blowout!” Come join us at the edge of the park to catch The Upper Saddle River Crafts Fair!!! [Wally–add twitter address for Blowout here]

Last year’s crafts fair! Can you smell the excitement, and the anticipation?!?

Come feast on the famous “Saddle River Hot Dog Buffet!!” People come from as far away as Trenton, just to taste these delicious “dogs!” Don’t be left out!!!

Design your own cotton candy confection–in different Day-Glo colors! Healthy (reduced fat) and delicious! Awesome!!

Shhh! There’s a rumor–just a rumor, mind you (!) that a special Celebrity Guest may arrive at the fair to snip the red ribbon, and to judge the “Hot Dog Buffet Eating Contest.” Whoever wins, gets a special weekend at Wanda N. Pickenhouser’s condo in Bermuda (in storm season–but beggar’s can’t be choosers!!) Last year V.N. Snozner won the contest. He ate 53 of those big dogs! (And was briefly hospitalized afterwards. A year later–he’s fine!)

Shhh! There’s a rumor that Ruth Bader Ginsburg may be the official judge of the Upper Saddle River “Hot Dog Buffet Eating Contest!” Personally, I’d like to watch Justice Ginsburg eat one of our special vegetarian Tofu hot dogs! Yum, yum!!

Crafts Fair Startles With Striking Originality; Dance Enthusiasts Thrilled

MONTCLAIR, NEW JERSEY: The Annual Montclair Summer Crafts Fair opened yesterday in beautiful downtown Montclair. Potential customers braved the July heat to admire local craftspeoples’ artistic wares.

Charming Montclair, New Jersey: site of the current Crafts Fair. Imagine embroidery lining these streets–thrilling thought, right?

“Just look at all of these little knots,” said Ethel Rheinbottom (44), admiring knitting and embroidery products. “I would go blind making them.” “We’re so proud of our local artists,” stated local Councilwoman Renee Wallour [age not given] “They add so much to the fabric of our community. Even if they don’t earn their living at their ‘art,’ that doesn’t mean it’s not valid.” (see local arts cooperative: http://www.montclairartsy.net, and twitter@montyartsy).

The next fair to grace Montclair’s streets is in two weeks. It’s the Fifth Annual Montclair Global Dance Festival. Folk Dancing from three Continents will be featured: North America, South America, and Iceland. [Wally–check to see if Iceland is a Continent] The festival will kick off with a demonstration of a Brazilian Wedding Dance, that takes place between the two parents-in-law. It has never been seen in Northern New Jersey before. Local dance enthusiasts (www.welovedancenj.net) are thrilled.

Example of the some of the fine knitting available at the Crafts Fair. Mind-bogglingly good!

Hard to imagine human hands embroidered this. So delicate!

Brazil: a country that dearly loves its folk-dancing.