PRINCETON, NEW JERSEY: Shh! The rumor mills slipped out today that everyone’s favorite handsome movie star George Clooney will be appearing at Princeton University this weekend to speak to the issue, “The Art of Being Suave!”
George Clooney, the suavest guy on the planet–for sure!
Clooney is reportedly giving his speech (the topic of which he has surely lived to the fullest, for at least four decades!!) to benefit his personal charity, “The Star Bright Foundation,” which aids gorgeous Hollywood starlets when they fall on hard times.
Some of the ladies who have benefited from the largesse of the Star Bright Foundation: Ah to be a Starlet, when George is in bloom!
As we all know, Mr. Clooney is always interested in serious philanthropic work. Reportedly he is starting another foundation, the “Double Dutch/Double Fun Foundation.” Apparently, George is afraid the art of double dutch jump roping he enjoyed as a child will be lost as an American art form, and he wants to preserve it. Excellent idea!
Double Dutch, as it was practiced in the youth of Mr. George Clooney.
Clooney’s long-time publicist stoutly denies the rumor that George will be shooting a commercial for Charmin Ultra-Soft Bathroom Tissue next month, to be shown only in the Asian market. “Everyone knows that George doesn’t speak Cantonese any more,” his representative snorted.
Charmin Ultra-Soft Bathroom Tissue: preferred by millions!!! (Including George Clooney, some maintain!!!)
Buzzy Widewheeler: the best darned journalist in Northern New Jersey 